Currently Watching: Rachel Hollis Presents: Made for More

Rachel Hollis, for those of you who don’t know, is the author of Girl, Wash Your Face. That’s for me. I didn’t know. But my girlfriend did and when we were perusing Amazon Prime together this past Friday, she pointed out this documentary and told me that 1) I need to step out from under my rock and read Rachel’s books and 2) the documentary would most likely be worthwhile.

How many of you have read her book(s)? Raise your hands!

I watched the documentary. In my pajamas. Holding a baby. Fighting this obnoxious Spring cold which came in like a wrecking ball (thank you, Miley), seemingly overnight, and has me feeling some kind of way (the way I imagine men feel when they have a cold). Namely, I’m dying.

Perhaps it’s this cold or sleep deprivation (even though F3 is the BEST SLEEPER EVER – I love him) but I cried several times. In my last post, I talked about being a recovering perfectionist and what this female, recovering perfectionist loves about this documentary is that Rachel hypes women. She celebrates all of us. You and me and herself.

Short detour: Men, let me be clear: In hyping women I’m not saying that you do not deserve to be hyped. You do. I think so often in this toxic culture we’re taught that celebrating one person means putting down another. It’s not true. I’m one of my husband’s biggest fans. In fact, I think I might just be his 2nd biggest fan, right behind my husband. That’s not a joke. 95% of the time, he has this lesson down. And that’s a GOOD thing! A man confident in his God-given talents is inspiring (not to mention sexy). My jokes about men started and ended with the man-cold line in this blog post. Honest.

Anyway, hyping women. Rachel is all about us chasing our unique dreams. Not listening to naysayers. And it is hard. I come from a line of worriers. My mother and I used to have long talks about worry. She called it out by name. Made me promise to do better. I am essentially a carbon copy of my mother. Do you know her? Well, you know me. We worry. We worry about everything and anything. And it has cost us.

So I think we need women to stand up and hype each other. To encourage each other. To encourage us to encourage ourselves. I think that’s a valuable lesson. Worry tells you that you do not have a voice worth hearing. Your lack of resume builders means you lack success and the potential to be successful. Your lack of an obedient child means you lack the skills needed to be a good parent (You guys, disobedience at age 5 is actually a growth marker! What *clap* The *clap* Hell *clap* Why is this not part of the 4 year-old well visit? Why is this not tattooed on the backs of our hands so we are reminded when we throw our hands up in defeat? It’s N-O-R-M-A-L.)

Worry tells you that your lack of confidence means you’re not ready. You shouldn’t. You couldn’t.

Worry tells you that there’s something wrong. It might be here or it might be just around the corner but unchecked it causes doubt and fear and shame (3 things a lot of us are good at).

“Made for More” served as a reminder to focus on the positives, put down the worry, and take steps to owning my narrative. I’m going to lean into that idea today and I hope you do too.

Currently Watching: The True Cost

I am an organization junkie. I don’t have all of the acrylic containers, expensive food storage, or wicker baskets to prove it but believe me when I tell you that I research this stuff constantly. I follow well known organizers on social media. I buy their books. I participate in their online challenges. I use the hashtags.

There’s this vague ideal I have in my head… This endpoint that I can just start to envision when everything has a place in my home and the excess has sloughed away. It’s calm. It’s easy to maintain. It restores.

Shelfie_20180413

But no matter how often I declutter, I continue to find more and more stuff. It accumulates. It makes friends. Those friends get married and have babies and the babies have babies and I am sitting around my kitchen table wondering where all of this stuff keeps coming from!

**********

Pinterest took note of my obsession and started suggesting organizational pins. Those pins led to minimalist pins and the minimalist pins led to fair trade pins. That’s where I stumbled across the suggestion to watch The True Cost on Netflix.

Listen carefully: I need you to watch it. But I need you to know that it broke me.

The True Cost is a documentary on the fashion industry and the consequence of fast fashion on business, people, and the environment. While it only talks about fashion, I see it as a single-industry focus on a much larger issue of goods that we once saved and now see as disposable.

I wept multiple times watching this documentary. I wept over horrible working conditions. I wept over illness and pollution. Over family dynamics and corporate wealth. Over silenced cries for better and my part in it all.

That stuff that keeps accumulating? It’s there because it’s cheap or it’s free and I am a consumer and I consume it. And while I’m busy consuming and decluttering and consuming and decluttering, I am reinforcing the drive for cheap labor, cheap manufacturing and for turning a blind eye to the people producing it.

I’m caught in the declutter frenzy and I’ve been missing the people stuck beneath the turning wheel.

DeclutterFrenzy

The solution identified in the frenzy isn’t a solution at all. The true solution has to come before and during consumption. I’m not a minimalist. But I am recognizing that being a good steward of my resources can’t stop at managing my finances, giving to charity, and paying for the recycling bin every month.

Financially, a $5 shirt is a bargain until you see The True Cost of that $5 shirt.

**********

It’s a burden to change habits, I know. When I started buying cruelty free products, it took time to research brands. Once I identified brands, it took trial and error to find which products worked for my family. Sometimes I pay more.

I expect an even greater disruption overhauling my habits when it comes to fast fashion. It’s going to require research. It will require trial and error. I will pay more. It’s possible that I will need to wait longer between identifying a desire and satisfying it. I will need to be aware and intentional when Emma grows two feet in a night and no longer has pants that fit her. I will have to stop and ask myself if it’s really necessary to run out and pick up something today to remedy the want/need.

I also know that being overwhelmed by change isn’t a good enough excuse to avoid it. And I know that starting, even starting small, is always better than not starting at all.

**********

Watch The True Cost. Let me know your thoughts. And if you’re already buying fair trade, let me know which brands you love.