I’m just going to come right out and say this: I’m getting a tattoo. Just one more to add to the dime-sized one that I already have and then I’m done. I know what there is to be said about tattooing myself. If you’re inclined to respond negatively, let me just cut you short by telling you the same thing I told to one of my closest friends: I value your opinion but I value my own more.

The tattoo is simply this:

“Proverbs 19:21” 

 

It reads:

“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”

 

My mom is against tattoos in general but has been pleasantly subdued in her opposition to this decision. Still, she has this fear that I will get the verse and it will serve as a constant reminder of my pain. I’m not worried. To me, the beauty of the verse is that it’s a constant reminder that I don’t have to plan out the future and that when my plans do fail – as they have in the past and will inevitably continue to do – I’m not lost or derailed. The Lord has a plan for me that is far greater than that which I can imagine on my own. It’s comforting and it’s challenging. It serves not as a reminder of my pain, but of a promise.

If you think it’s trashy – so be it. I’m a class act. And I’m getting my second tattoo. I can’t imagine that anyone gets a tattoo in the same manner that they go out and get the latest trends to wear, so I’m not worried about it going out of style. 1) Because the only time it will be visible to everyone will be at the beach and – let’s be honest – if people focus on my tattoo instead of my beach attire, I’m okay with it! and 2) I’m getting it for me – a sentiment of my own faith.

When all is said and done, I am a little hurt that people feel inclined to openly react negatively to this decision and it does bother me… but I’m also really excited to get it done! I went in and Chase (the artist) sketched out a few versions that didn’t really suite me. They were all curly and cursive and delicate. I didn’t know what I had in mind but I suggested maybe something a little less delicate would be more up my ally. In the end? We decided on old typewriter font – stamped and a little imperfect. When he started sketching it out – it was like he had read my mind even though I hadn’t come in with a plan. Fate? Maybe. Spontaneity on my part? Give it to me – I think that’s pretty good.

I’m making my own decisions. “Beautiful” Lucy Schwartz