Palms

Freddy makes me laugh more than anyone else. He’s hilarious. Sometimes, he knows that he’s hilarious but sometimes he just happens into situations that make me laugh until I cry.

Let me give you an example:

Palms.

I came home after work one night and was greeted by two very large palms in front of our door. My first thought was: My neighbor must be doing some house cleaning. I’ll just ask if he or she is done and ready to take their plants back inside.

I knocked and our neighbor answered. She explained that they might be her neighbor’s plants, but that the neighbor was in the process of moving out. I then introduced myself as her new neighbor and explained that Freddy and I had already moved in.

“Oh!” she exclaimed, “They must be from our neighbor downstairs. I’ll go talk to him.”

I thanked her and moved past the palms into our place. A few seconds later, I heard a knock on the door.

“Honey, these are your palms.” she said. “Apparently, your husband was talking to our neighbor about how much he liked them, so our neighbor left them for you.”

Palms? Really? I thanked her and apologized for troubling her while I dragged my palms inside and called Freddy…

I LOVE my husband. He melts my heart.

Apparently, Freddy got to talking shop with our neighbor downstairs about his landscaping. The neighbor excitedly offered him two of his palms that weren’t going to be able to weather the winter and Freddy must have nodded in agreement before heading to work.

He was as surprised as I was that there were two large palms greeting us at our door. “Don’t you want palms, though, hun?” he asked.

HA! I don’t want these darn palms!

After a few weeks, a knocked over plant, and several run-ins with the largest palm, we made up our minds. It was the middle of the night and we had had it with these overly large palms. Fearing that our neighbor was going to catch us, we devised a plan.

The smallest plant could hide outside on the porch, out of the eye-line of our neighbor, but the largest plant we decided to hide… in the dumpster!

We had to move it in the middle of the night so as not to offend our neighbor for trashing his generous gift, so that’s just what we did! Fred did the “heavy” lifting, but I agreed to open the dumpster lid to help pull it off. I know it’s wrong…but we panicked!

(I apologize to those of you who would’ve loved these. If we get ourselves into this situation again, we will absolutely gift them to you!)

We got away with it, but now I have constant fear that we’re going to be found out. We can never have that neighbor over. And what if one of our neighbors across the pond is friends with our neighbor downstairs and points out our yellow plant dying on the patio?

It’s the heartbeat under the floorboards.

And just another reason why I love my husband SO much! He loves people. He wouldn’t want to say no to our new neighbor so instead, we’re palm murderers. It’s an awful way to start our neighborhood relations but an awesome way to start our own stack up of great stories here.

What can I say…he cracks me up!

2 thoughts on “Palms

  1. You better hope your neighbor never reads your blog!!
    I laughed out loud. Start coming up with something for when your neighbor asks to see his beautiful and lush palms in the spring.

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