Currently Reading: Daring Greatly

2018 is shaping up to be the year of books for me and I. am. not. mad. about it.

After finishing Start with Why, I picked up Brené Brown’s Daring Greatly. It belongs to a really good girlfriend of mine who may or may not remember I still have it. Surprise! It’s still heeeeeere!

The timing wasn’t quite right when it first changed hands but as a follow up to Start with Why, I am digging her message! Why? Here’s the subtitle: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead.

Seems pertinent.

While Sinek got me thinking about my own personal Why (i.e. what inspires me), Brown is pointing out my roadblocks to living out that Why and she’s giving me tips on how to get past them.

Here’s what you need to know about me:

I am (to steal Brown’s phrase) a [recently] recovering perfectionist.

Around this time last year, I felt an urge to get back into writing. I paid for blogging space. I set writing goals and publishing goals. I wrote down topics as they came to me. I told my friends and my family. And it weighed on me. For the majority of 2017, do you know what I did with my blog?

I did nothing.

Getting back into blogging was supposed to be like getting back on a bike. I had turned to writing as a cathartic release for years but it suddenly felt foreign and forced. And here are a list of reasons why:

  • I am afraid of:
    • being boring.
    • having nothing to say.
    • rambling.
    • publishing misspelled words, wrong words, confusing words.
    • sharing something too personal.
    • embarrassing myself or my people.
    • repeating myself.
    • being irrelevant.
    • being ignored.
    • making someone mad.
    • being mean.
    • giving someone a reason to bring up my past mistakes. <- There is so much this and there are so many mistakes!
    • sounding self-righteous.
    • having my excitement met with silence.
    • introducing a topic I’m passionate about in a way that turns a reader off.
    • tying myself to a person or company or idea that ends up being a failure.
    • being a failure myself.

You get the idea.

Blogging = vulnerability for me and it would seem that what I’ve really forgotten is how to be vulnerable.

Behind this blog, as I’m starting to understand, is my Why. God instilled in me a passion for growth and learning. I’m obsessed. The day I stop trying to do better is the day I die. Writing is my way of capturing that journey (which, by the way, is ultimately life), trying to make sense of it, and sharing my excitement about it with others. I have to say so far I’ve been pretty lucky… Not in doing better, per se, or in writing but let’s say God has given me a lot of things to work on.

So I’m reading this book and I’m developing this grasp of what pushed me to start writing again and I’m thinking about the ways I’ve been standing in my own way. I’m (re)learning what it means to be vulnerable and why it’s so important. And I’m hoping that in diving into the raw space here, you and I might end up toasting to one another over the stumbling blocks of life.

If, not? If instead you find yourself reading through my list of fears and agreeing that I should be afraid of those things, well then I hope one day to be as strong as Rhett Butler walking out the door. But until then, I am going to do me and I encourage you to do you. Maybe some day, we will find our common ground. After all, tomorrow is another day.

2 Blogs Combined

Have you ever merged WordPress blogs?

It takes an incredible amount of time. Or maybe it takes an average amount of time but it feels like an incredible amount of time.

What did I just do?

Did I break it? Did I just lose all of my history?

What is this going to look like? How jumbled did I just make my site?

When I started on WordPress, I wrote under and I was incredibly heartbroken. I poured out my pain in words and formed a blog. Then, the man who broke my heart asked me to marry him and I said yes. (I know, right?!) It felt wrong to write about married life under the same blog that I had bared my soul so I started Emotional bruises turned into baby pictures and (quite frankly) my writing turned to absolute crap over the past few years.

Then this year, something piped up in my heart. Quiet. Timid. But present. Start writing again.

I purchased my own domain because I thought that meant I was “serious” about writing. But when my fingers hit the keyboard, I felt a little rusty. Or a lot rusty.

True writers will warn you not to look back at your old writings but I started to long for the ease I used to have when I poured out my heart and knew that only I would be swept up in a wave of backlash if there was one. I love that style of writing!

So today, I merged my blogs. I read a quick blog about the right way to do it and then I threw caution to the wind, exported megdanielle and imported it into megdaniellemarried…which is now Confused yet?

Well, it worked. I’ve got archives into 2010 and I found some writing queues that are worth repeating in 2017.

Have something you want to try on your list? Write it on your to-do list for tomorrow and get it done!


Quit this Hiatus. I Need to Write.

Déjà vu. It’s that feeling that hits me in the face on a warm, closing night that has me looking at things indirectly out of the corner of my eye. It’s the bass that hits and shifts my hips back and forth without so much as a warning. It’s the feeling of confidence that stands up straight inside me and brings a smile to my face. It’s throwing the moon roof back to soak up the warmth and the memories of the outdoors. It’s Spring and it’s got me feeling like I’m on back on top.

It struck me tonight that I’ve been spending too much time away from the one thing that I will never grow too old for. Too long since I’ve thought about what I want to say or how I want to say it. Too long since I’ve worked something out on “paper.” Too long since I’ve thrown caution to the wind. Laid out my flaws. Bared it all.

Truth is, you can only walk away something that you love for so long before it calls you back.

Ladies and gentlemen, I think I’m back…

“Give Me Everything” Pitbull